Managerial Dilemas..and herbal tea. TSDPG!

Crikey what a very busy week I've had. Instead of putting my feet up and relaxing in the splendour of the North West Chairman's International week spa week away I've had to try and find us a new Manager. I was so looking forward to that week as well and I've got Whealo texting every 5 minutes with just how good his Pie Massage is going and how the face masks taste of Mango Chutney.

I put this to one side and create my shortlist. Eddie wanted to be here to oversee things so I don't pick "someone utterly mental again" but a) We're out of Parkin and b) he'll have to pay tax if he stops long enough so he babysits me with one of his minders.

Joe, the minder, tells me that Eddie thinks we should get someone young and up and coming but me and the board are thinking gravel faced and wisened. I try and ring Big Sam to see if he can point me in the right direction but he's busy pointing and laughing right outside Steve Kean's house so may be a while. We had Steve Kean's CV in earlier and on paper he's brilliant. Sadly we know that he didn't lead Blackburn to 4 Champions Leagues and the World Cup or that he taught Pele football once.

4 hours in and I've got 2 names and several doodles of various stick men. One of the names on my sheet is Alan Titchmarsh as his TV show was on at the time and I got distracted. Anyways he'll not come - I sounded him out whilst I was in London late last week. Apparently if it aint gardening or entertainment he aint doing it. I tried to tell him there'll be a lot of grass and football is a sort of entertainment but he was having none of it. The other name is Big Sam & Reidy together at last. That's a no go after the last time they got together. It took weeks to clean up the mess.

I call Doris in for my weekly vat of Herbal tea, (to keep the weight off), and some lovely chockie bikkies to dunk. I'm rudely interupted by the phone going off mid dunk. Well, well looks as if we have reached a compromise. I quickly down the brew and stuff all the biscuits in my coat pocket and race for the door.

If I get this spot on we could have the new manager of Bolton Wanderers in by tonight!!!!