Another wunter exclusive!!

Wunter under Meijer “WORLD exclusive"

The full apology made by Suarez to Buckie Boy Rodgers.

Luis Suarez, the former Liverpool super star who “nearly" signed for Arsenal this week and so many other weeks, has written an apology to his manager seeking to explain his reasoning for seeking such a patently fake transfer. It seems he does not trust his pidgeon English anywhere but around Guardian reporters and the letter was never meant for publication but you’re very own back door snoopers here at Wunter rifled through the trash to find it.

In the very best traditions of our faithful profession rather than publish the entire journal of inane rantings we have decided only to publish the quotes that suit us, however we are sure Suarez won’t mind being quoted out of context. He never does when at home at any rate.

"Chou me Amigo I spent the entire time in Japan chewing over what to say, I felt so alone training where nobody was close enough to pinch, slap or guffaw at. I decided to write down how I feel and this letter is an apology to you my sacred cow and to my fans as a great big "Sorry" for my disgraceful behavior towards those to lick my hole for so long. Especially this summer where my almost move to arsenal nearly came off.

"I always enjoyed playing for you buck, especially you but also in front of my adoring anfield faithful, and taking my £130,000-a-week salary laughing all the while knowing that I didn't want to stay there in the long-term, because in my little head no matte rwhat I do I’m entitled to Champions league and massive wages. Trophies.. Not so important and that’s why arsenal were so intriguing.
"Once I had spoken to Guaridoa about the almost singing I knew there was nowhere else I wanted to nearly go. I really didn't intend a long affair but though this nearly bid would surely trigger a bid from a “real" side and get me a huge wage.

"To reiterate, and to make things crystal clear for you buckie, although Liverpool are a bigger club, Arsenal are a great almost move and I am honored to almost move to them. I’ll bow down now cos Real are not in for me and I’ll scrape by on 130k but I hope that very soon I’ll be off and you will wish me well.

“I hope this year I don’t need to abuse, bite or gouge anyone to get my move but right now I might feel like it so sorry in advance."

Wunter:

did we fabricate anything? do we look like Apple? of course we make our own stuff