What sayings and clichés irritate you

Andy Townsend praising a player the only way he knows how - to say their full name. 'Good job, Steven Gerrard.' 'Well played, Jack Wilshere.' Great tackle, Frank Lampard' Etc.

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He only does that with English players you'll notice. Even though he's clearly Irish, you can tell by his accent.

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(I(n a game currently at 0-0), "They should be 2/3-0 up" like it's a guaranteed science that had said team converted the first missed chance the game would have played out and the chances come in the exact same manner.

No sliding door theory with these guys as tactical changes and or mentality shifts don't exist in their world.

"He couldn't quite take it under his spell"

If I wanted Harry Potter I'd go and rattle J K Rowling

I think it was Mark Wright when commentating a game. If its a Premiership side v a Championship team or lower and the lower team does a hard tackle he always would says ' Their league is always more physical then the Premiership'

Fúck off....its the same.........

'Alan Shearer is reviewing missed chances, and he says, "and he should, er, he should score there."'

Again, this is something Hansen is bad at. He can barely finish a sentence

'what irks me even more is when someone tries to sound native and pronounces Car-zola's name Ca-thu-thu-tha'

Think it's Steve Wilson who goes halfway and pronounces it like the 'th' in 'the'. At least have conviction, you muppet. I remember when he arrived he and Arteta said it was 'Cathorla' but recently I watched a video were Santi himself says 'Cazorla'. Got massive respect for Jonathan Pearce.

'Mark lawrensens general smarmyness'

I quite like Lawro He's dreadful but at least he tries to have a laugh

'When everybody mistakes coincidence for irony.'

Can't remember any commentators doing this, but if they did

'Andy Townsend praising a player the only way he knows how - to say their full name. 'Good job, Steven Gerrard.' 'Well played, Jack Wilshere.' Great tackle, Frank Lampard' Etc.'

That is a great shout

Got another couple, firstly the fact that commentators (Tyldesley in particular) will raise their voices any time Wayne Rooney is in the attacking third. Lost count of the number of times I've heard "ROOOONEEEY!" shortly before a goal kick is given.

Also, Clarke Carlisle. That voice.

Speaking of lawro, what DOES he look like?, talk about lost in the 80's, with his mullet and candy stripe shirts with big collars, always slouched in his chair showing off his keg, and get a shave man, you look like a tramp

'what irks me even more is when someone tries to sound native and pronounces Car-zola's name Ca-thu-thu-tha'
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Matt smith of itv is the worst for that

Schteve McClaren pretending he's dutch as well

"If [insert Messi/Ronaldo and or clichéd and sterotyped nationally - usually Brazilian)] had scored a goal like that we'd be talking about it for [insert hyperbolic measurement of time]"