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@@@Jon Otsemobor - Gun Games@@@

"It was tense I tell you that. I never even went clubbing because Mr Houllier told me that was for demons and paedophiles. I was out with my friend Darren who had just had a baby girl and we went to Wonderbar to celebrate. It was a fun club, lots of girls, good music and a hefty stash of mean green being outsourced from the men’s toilets.

So we were there having a puff and a drink and suddenly all hell breaks loose. Gun shots fired. None of us could work out what was happening or where the shots were fired from. My instinct took over. I did what they taught me to do in training when defending a free-kick. Just get your buttocks on it. I did the old fashioned delve and switch and managed to take two bullets in the left cheek. The first was a clipper. No problem. The second was a lodger. I tell you what I've never seen a pair of tongs quite like them. Doctor West had to use them in conjunction with a series of pullies and chains. After three days they managed to dislodge it. A brutal experience but one that I survived. During my time in hospital I had some strange flashbacks, some odd dreams. I could see the shooter. I could see his face.

They claimed to have caught the perpetrator but to this day I know they got the wrong man. I saw the eyes of the shooter and it wasn't the person they arrested and charged. It was Michael Ball. Back down from Scotland to handle unfinished business. He crossed the border with the full intention of putting a bullet in my buttock and a bullet in my bōllock. I'm grateful every single day I still have that in tact. I need it badly. I'm a uniball."

Jon Otsemobor, who is now in the witness protection programme, recounts an incident which has overshadowed his footballing career in his new book entitled 'Gun Games' which is on sale now.

posted on 3/7/16

LAMBO

posted on 3/7/16

posted on 3/7/16

Remember when you got caught for having two accounts and for talking to yourself on your own articles ?

posted on 3/7/16

^Haters gon hate and they gon tell lies. My status on this board is beyond certified. Mans is the most legendary poaster of all time. It's not even questionable at this point. My poast game been top shelf.

posted on 3/7/16

LAMBO stiggy

posted on 6/7/16

Missed you Stig!

A bit different from your usual articles but still slammin.

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