The Rime of the Ancient Ram-iner

Seems Abu Dhabi is concentrating on imprisoning their Princess Margaret and thus another 48 hours becomes an ocean, 'pon which the good ship Derby County drifts, looking for the occasional huff and puff of a high press or the odd set piece, to stay afloat, all the while trying to avoid the rocky outer reefs of "can't commit to a kick off time" Rotherham.

In December the players were bailed out by the loan sharks, eagerly following our trawler, knowing scraps would be thrown off the side. What's happened since??

John Percy has walked the plank, his reputation for truth, torn, tattered and tardy, like the battered sails of our once Premier bound vessel.

Captain Mel, last seen with an albatross round his neck, hasn't been out of his quarters in a while. Is he now paying those on deck, or is it still the sharks?

First mate Rooney is looking through his binoculars, 2nd mate Rosenior is still trying to work out why Max Bird in a back three didn't sink HMS Warnock.

Rumours of a strong Westerly from the US coming to take us to shore are only that, like the Easterly that was going to line our oars with gold. For now though we just drift on a flat windless sea. 1st mate Rooney sees only, the half sunken hull, of the heroin trading clipper, the wanqship Nottingham, on the horizon. The dilapidated faded pink of their sails, as sorry a sight as ever on the eye, as they track in ever decreasing circles of dignity, unable to cut themselves free from the suffocating anchor of anti football, their seamen huddled together like a parked bus, that will never move again, shipmates taking a trip mates, bound for fiddlers green.

The sea is still, stagnant with the acrid stench of Covid. Still our able seamen run through the motions of their morning drills, all is quiet n a bit 5hit if I was to be honest.

Bobbin up n down on watter, waiting to be carried to shore, bereft of a compass, looking up t' stars that hide beneath a blanket of never retreating cloud.

Longing for some eagle eyed booger to pipe up n shout
"Land Ahoy"