Owlstom needed

Where the eck is our Deedar defence correspondent when he's needed.

Owlstom, the Admiral of the Hillsboro navy, currently drafted away from defending the Falklands, to serve a spell of landlubber duties to protect us from the Taliban.

Well, since youve been getting a suntan, those crafty Argies are sneaking around, plotting and planning to possibly get control of those Islands that you couragesly defended.
Cameron's been gesturing to defend them, but while you've been away
he's scrapped half your ships. the Plonker.
So start packing Tom, your gunna be needed again,defending the
Falklands with pedaloe's out of Ascension island.
Yes your navy is in that bad a shape