Dave Pundit's Predictions

Hi, I'm Dave Pundit. This weekend sees the first cup final of the season. As a boy you dreamed of playing in occasions like this. Well not exactly like this, you'd dream of the FA Cup if you were dreaming of anything, but a trophy's a trophy nonetheless and this is the reason you get into football. Well that and the booze and the women obviously.

Chelsea v Bolton
Chelsea are on a bit of a poor run at the moment and it's no coincidence that it's come when John Terry is injured. He is their rock and if you remove a rock then you lose your entire identity. Take Gibraltar for example. It's a fine, upstanding British colony but what would it be without its rock? Spanish that's what. Having said that though even the Spanish could beat this Bolton team.
Verdict: 2-0

Newcastle v Wolves
It's no surprise to me that Wolves are struggling to find a new manager, who'd choose to live in the Midlands? They need a good dependable Englishman to follow Mick McCarthy and his wayward Irish ways, it's a shame Walter Smith turned them down, he'd've been perfect. Newcastle will be far too strong for them here there far too well run a club to mess about with sacking managers half way through a season.
Verdict: 3-1

QPR v Fulham
This has to be the world's least tantalising London derby. In fact the only reason it has any spice at all is because it marks Mark Hughes's return to Craven Cottage where he left fairly inexplicably last year. Thank God for people in football doing inexplicable things eh? Without it we'd have to concentrate on what's going to happen on the pitch and that's going to be godawful quite frankly. In honour of inexplicability I'm going to go and kill and eat a pony.
Verdict: 3-3

West Brom v Sunderland
Sunderland did everyone a favour and knocked Arsenal out of the FA Cup last week and hopefully they can kick seven bells out of West Brom's resident foreigner Roy Hodgson too. I have to say one foreigner did impress me for Sunderland against Arsenal though, that Sebastian Larsson looked pretty good. I bet Arsenal wish they could produce players of his quality.
Verdict: 0-1

Wigan v Aston Villa
Thank God it looks like Wigan are going down. That'll teach them for hiring a French manager. Villa have had a few problems recently but I expect them to get a good win here and give Robbie Keane the send off he deserves. He's proved it doesn't matter how old you are if you're British you're still good enough.
Verdict: 1-2

Man City v Blackburn
The Tevez saga seems to have come to an end and I can say with my hand on heart, thank the Lord that it has. If I'd been forced to see his face splashed all over the papers one more time I might have literally been physically sick. Still now he's back he should help them be able to win ugly. Not that they'll need to against Blackburn of course. Steve Kean is a much better manager than he gets credit for but there's no way he could ever get his team to beat one of the top four.
Verdict: 3-0

Arsenal v Tottenham
This game is all about one thing and one thing only bragging rights and points on the board. Of course Tottenham will be bragging that they've got the England manager as there boss and even though he took some time out to pick the England squad this week I'm sure he's fully focused on Spurs right now. Whatever the result here you can't deny that Redknapp is a far more successful manager than Wenger will ever be.
Verdict: 1-2

Norwich v Man Utd
I think Norwich have surprised many people with how good they've been this season. They've dipped their toe into the waters of the Premiership and decided they liked the temperature so they've plunged the other five toes in too. And all credit to them. They'll still get destroyed by Man Utd though.
Verdict: 0-3

Stoke v Swansea
Thank God Rory Delap's red card has been lifted in time for this game. Until now I thought he was purely a long throw expert but it looks like he can also put in a proper leg breaking tackle too. And if every their was a game where you'd want the Stoke players to break some opposition legs it's this one. Do the Welsh even have legs?
Verdict: 2-0

Cardiff City v Liverpool
It is a travesty that Cardiff are even allowed in this, or any other competition. They're not British and they're not even in the Premier League, why do they exist? Luckily they're facing the mighty Liverpool, who'll show those Welsh b*stards who's boss. I predict a Craig Bellamy hat-trick to prove that England is, and always will be, superior to Wales.
Verdict: 0-4