Fabregas and Nasri both out

Hope to see Fabregas there though and get a standing ovation
Then everyone sits down when Nasri comes out

Line ups have just been announced on Arsenal.com

-------Buffon------

-Jenkinson-Cahill-Hummels-Baines-

-Hazard-Vertonghen-Sneijder-Mata-

-Gervinho-Benzema-


I think they're just hoping to flog the last remaining tickets though... why else would they be starting Jenkinson ahead of Sagna?

---------Benzema-----
----------------------------VP----------
Mata-----------------------------------Gervinho
----------------Alcantara---------------
---------------------------M'Villa--------------
God------Subotic------Vermaelen---Sagna
--------------------Szczesny-------------------

I joke.
-------------Vela----------
Rosicky---------------Gervinho
---------Ramsey---Wilshere----
--------------Frimpong------------
Gibbs---Squillaci---Koscielny---Eboue
-----------------Almunia

God can play pretty much anywhere - well everywhere at once, actually - on the pitch.

Ha bluddy ha lex - when exactly did we sign "Hummels"? I thought it was all English grit?

God's vision on the pitch is even better than Fabregas'

"God can play pretty much anywhere..."

------------------

We'd need cover for those pesky Sunday fixtures though.

God, Allah, Shiva, Ron Paul and the Flying Spaghetti Monster. They're fantastic signings.

It's just occurred to me that, if we sign Allah, the broadcasting companies wouldn't be allowed to show the games

Surely we have an Arab/Israeli bench?
And what about all those Chinese guys we've just converted?

Is Nasri out?

Pat Rice to be replaced by Buda?

Yup, he's just popped down the Offy for a 4 pack of extra brew and 20 Citanes.

Where are the sensible answers to my serious question? So far all I have heard are silly jokes, which leads me to suspect that Arsenal fans do not really know what they are talking about.
Where are all those knowledgeable types with infallible sources that tell us to mark their words, watch this space etc - where are they now?
I'm watching this space, and waiting.
And who is this wretched Hummels that we have apparently signed for an undisclosed (but bargain) fee, and why was he not announced? Should we boo him, or wait a little?

Wait a little... then boo him.

His signing was announced at the same time as Arsenal.com sneaked Gervinho's on to the bottom of the news page... for a laugh presumably.

Which is why no one knows about it yet.

Not even me.

Are Barcelona interested in him yet? Or has he already been sold on. Have Manure, Citeh and Chvs put in bids?

Hang on...who is he?
Does anybody know who this Hummels is, who we have apparently signed?

Neven Subotic and Mats Hummels are the highly rated CB pairing of current Bundesliga Champions Borussia Dortmund.

"Highly rated" meaning, "not coming to Arsenal".

So you lied when you said he was playing on Sunday!
That's mean, I was looking forward to him playing.
Mata will be there, right?

What can I say stepy... I'm sorry.