By about point 4 I was exhausted and could feel the strength vanishing from my legs. But I was determined to reach the waterfall at the end of point 6. If I had known how long it actually was from point 4 to point 6 then I probably would not have gone any further. What also became apparent soon after point 4 was that the marked trail all but disappeared. Instead of following a marked path now I was just following the river. But the land route went high up a large hill and before long I was way above river level. I pressed on shouting ton gloi ton gloi ton gloi imagining the story that I would write afterwards about how I wouldn’t stop no matter how exhausted I was. The whole time I knew that I was up against the clock as I only had so many hours to get there and back before nightfall. And once night arrived I would be left to the jungle, and its deadly snakes, and its jaguars.

I finally saw the waterfall. To get down to it, I had to go down a steep slope, up a slope and then down another big steep slope. I weighted up whether I would be able to get back up if I went down and I decided that I would. All the time on the way down I was worried that I would not be able to get back up the slopes. By this stage I was well down on water and realized that I had not brought enough in spite of how carefully I was rationing it, it was a concern.

But I made it down to river level and saw the magnificent ton gloi waterfall. As much as the waterfall was good, the sight of jungle canopy rising up on either side of the ravine which I was in was more impressive. I shouted and sang and knew that no human being could hear me. I striped off and went for a swim. The current was too strong to get near the waterfall but I merrily swam around at the bottom. I allowed myself 30 minutes before I had to start heading back to ensure that I beat the nightfall – that was if I made it back up the slope of course ! My legs were already cramping solid wit exhaustion.

When I got out and put my clothes back on, I had a big leach on my sock and a little one on my foot. Although they say you shouldn’t do it, I pulled it off. It is amazing how much adesion they have. Before I was dressed I also saw a very large snake a few metres away. It didn’t take any more than that for me to decide it was time to be off.

I set myself the target of getting backup the slopes and went at it like I was on an army training course. I was extremely relieved to reach the top within a few minutes and thought now that I was out of danger. Sadly though, I hadn’t taken into account the lack of a path when it came to getting back. Quickly I realized I was totally lost. The next hour and a half of my life were complete hell as I became convinced that I was going to die. It was an unpleasant feeling. Although I did not think that I was scared, I noticed that I was shaking uncontrollably. It was a horrible empty feeling of great sadness. I must have crossed over the path back down the hill because I found myself quickly on a steep slope with thick vines the only things stopping me from tumbling down as the ground below was too loose to take a proper footing.

At one point I reached 2 possible routes through the vegetation. One was up and one was down. I decided on the basis that I did not physically have the energy to go up that I had to go down. I began to walk downwards but a couple of times lost my grip and tumbled down the hill, stopped only by becoming wrapped up in vines. At one point something fell off my arm and for a while I thought that it was my water bottles bag, before I realised that it was the camera which I had attached to my wrist by a strap. With the exhaustion and the bangs to the head suffered in the falls, I was unable to notice the difference. Although I was distraught at losing my camera with all the jungle shots on, I was relived at least to realise that I still had water. Even this consolation though didn’t last as I reached a point in my route which suddenly came to an end. I had found myself n the edge of a large cliff looking down on the rocks way below in all directions. Without a doubt the only chance that I had to live was to go back up the hill that I had just half crawled and half fallen down. I had to get back to the point where I had decided I couldn’t go up, and then I had to go up, and then I had to hope that got me somewhere.

Just getting back up the slope was a miracle. Because there was no footing on the loose and steep ground I had to get a tree trunk behind my back and jump for the next tree, branch or vine. Eventually I got back to the point where I had begn to descend.

Some time shortly after I found myself looking at a small cliff in front of me down to more jungle further below. The distance was too great to jump off but a few metres in front there was a large tree trunk that had fallen such that it ran from the top of the small cliff to the bottom. I took a run up and leapt for the tree. I grabbed it and managed to slide down in such a way as to enable me to land below without injury.

But I was still in dense jungle and had no idea where the way out was. Eventually I found a small tributary and relaised that I had to try to follow this down to the river and hope that its path did not cross a large cliff before it reached ground level. All that I wanted to do was stop lie down and go to sleep. But I knew that to do that meant almost certain death. I was so exhausted that I was unable to tell which direction the stream was flowing, and had to constantly keep checking that I was walking down stream. To make matters worse the path of the stream was regularly blocked with fallen trees and vegetation and the routes around would lead away from the stream again.

Eventually, completely exhausted I found my way back to river level. With water supplies almost low I drank from the river. I drank and drank and drank. I did not know how far down stream I had to go, but for the first time in over an hour I thought that I had a significant chance of surviving. i began to imagine what elation I would surely feel if I made it out alive.

I could not face going back into the jungle and decided that if I had to die drowning would be far preferable to falling off a cliff. So I decided I would ride the river downstream. This would mean going through rapids and over waterfalls but it was my only way out. I walked out into the river and just let it take me. It was an exhilarating experience. I found myself laughing such was the thrill of it even though I knew I was still in a life threatening situation.

Some time later I found the path out of the jungle. The vehicle access road back seemed interminably long. My legs simply could not go on. But they did. I knew once I had reached the road that I would not die. But there was no elation. I was just exhausted, and saddened by the whole experience.

When I got back into the village I collapsed on the bridge over the river which had just saved my life. I lay there for about half an hour and then tries to get up. But my legs were cramped solid and I couldn’t move. It took me about another half hour just to stand. I bought a large bottle of water and several treats from the village store and made my way back to my hut.

I told a local guide working in a restaurant what had happened. He said he had never heard of anyone going to the waterfall on their own in rainy season before. And when I told him about getting lost he said “how did you get out?”. I said “a bit of luck, a bit of common sense, and a lot of determination”. A group of tourists had died in the jungle there in a landslide a few months before I visited. And there is no doubt that I was extremely lucky not to join them.

But when did you find the sheep?

i give up

I applied for a job not long ago with a big consultancy firm.

One of their recruitment guys called me back but I missed his call. I called back and left a message.

Didn't hear back from him so I left it.

Just thought I'd give him another try today.

I have patchy mobile reception so I use the landline here.

It goes to voicemail, so I leave a message saying give me a try on my mobile, but if you can't get through then if you can send me an email i'll give you a call back or we can arrange a time.

2 minutes later the phone rings. I get up and race towards the phone, knowing there's another phone upstairs.

I was out for a few hours yesterday and so I know my mum's going to pick the phone up quickly in case it's something she can get any feedback from about where I was yesterday.

3 rings and I'm in the kitchen about a ring away from being able to pick it up.

It stops.

"Oh god no" I think/say.

Go upstairs to see if I can hear her on the phone.

This is what I heard:

hello

hello

hello

hello

hello

can you hear me ?

hello

hello

hello

hello

hello

hello

hello

hello

at about this point I say "please just hang the phone up"

"Oh have you picked it up TIm ?"

"no, just hang up the phone"

hello

hello

hello

hello

hello

hello

hello

hello


hello


it says line in use


hello ?

hello

hello

hello

this must have lasted a full 2 minutes.

just "hello" with an "it says line in use" and a couple of "can you hear me"s.

I go back downstairs and put my shoes and coat on to go for a walk

My mum comes in the kitchen and after what must have been at least 60 hellos, asks me if it was for me.

comment by Hello You Conte (U3338)
posted 1 hour, 50 minutes ago
But when did you find the sheep?
----------------------------------------------------------------------

So I go for a walk round the block thinking, it probably wasn't him..

Get back and there's a message

"Tim, please call ******* (the guy) back on ...."

As I'm looking at the note my mum walks in again..


I say was it him you were saying hello to ?

She says I've got to call him back

I say was it him you were saying hello to ?

She says "well I was trying not to break my neck coming down the stairs, I hope that's alright ?"

That one's up there with the time I'd spoken to the MD of a firm about 3 years ago, and he says that I should speak with his head of HR about terms etc.

She's supposed to liase with me over what number to call me on, but she uses her initiative and somehow finds the fkin landline number here, and of course the old man answers in the middle of one of his normal bad moods.

next thing I know

"TIM"

"TIM"

"TIM"

"WHERE THE BLAADY HELL IS TIM ??"

"TIM"

"TIM"

"TIM"

"OH THERE YOU ARE. There's some woman on the phone for you"

(hands me the phone not on mute)

No not this again

If i'm not wanted then not an issue.