Not that sort of blog and not from our great captain SKD
Time to wrap up warm, kick away some tumbleweed. Now is the time to sit indoors and save those pennies. Trawl the brochures and consider your next vacation. Package tour, white Caribbean beaches, Camping ! Be careful not to choose a cruise.
Tales from Asian shores.
A ghost ship. Strange happenings, dark spirits.
Here locals will not venture out upon the sea. Out on the famous mooring buoy where once stood this shadowy legendary ghost ship a silk red ribbon flutters on the breeze. With fear in their eyes the locals tell how on the anniversary night of the ghost ships arrival the bell stop tolling replaced by the yap yap of a little dog.
If you stand upon these shores jagged rusting metal breaking the moonlight as it shines across on the waters a voice can be heard from the seas, a cry of Archie sending shivers down your spine you may see the ghost ship as she slides beneath the sea.
Evidence you may see. A video found by school children playing on the sands showing ghostly happenings. Sit and watch as a film is shown. A splendid captain’s cabin of old, a faint figure of a man can be seen upon the bed. It appears he is in some distress a picture of a reddish haired man broken on the floor. The picture flickers, a female shape flashes like a balloon being quickly released flying around the cabin it fades around the screen. A distorted cry of Pam is it you heard? The picture fades out as distorted ripples rise from the bottom of the screen. Proof they say the tales are true. A couple so in love they couldn’t be parted they were lost to the deep sailing aboard the ghost ship.
In the village sits a little shop where you may buy souvenirs of your trip. Copies of the video in genuine old style BBC packaging, replica puncture repair kits as found alongside the video in the sands. Reproduction brochures from the fabled cruise lines famous days, the biggest seller is of course a misprinted one thought to exist it shows where they say the ship sails today a ghost upon the seas cruising from a Mediterranean island to the Italian city of canals around the seas she never did sail. Nobody knows if there is an original brochure or where it went, perhaps it went down with the ship.
Do visit a fine little snack shop in the villages where you can sample hand held local pastry snacks rather fine food in the shape of the ghost ship wrapped in authentic paper shares. Legend has it. eat these and evil spirits will not bother you.
Treat the kids; a gift a local toy. A Meggo Buster torch, it casts a shadowy outline of the ghost ship in the dark, sounding a little yap yap when you switch it on. Arrrchieee is sounded by clapping your hands. A feeble cry of Paaaaammmm as it powers off. Fully waterproof, batteries included.
Captains Blog
posted on 23/3/13
...and 'tis said that on certain nights a shadowy figure can be seen crouched on the beach, huddled against the wind and crashing surf, as he tries desperately to find the particular palm tree he buried his box of Special Shares under.
He stumbles from tree to tree, child's spade in hand, as he frantically digs and scratches at the sand.
But to no avail......
Time hasn't been kind to the lonely "Wanderer"......
His memory isn't what it used to be and his desperation to find the treasure grows with every waning of the silver moon....
"Why hast thou forsaken me and left me to search in vain for what I know is rightfully mine?" he cries, as he stares balefully at his 1983 Panini sticker album opened at the Sheffield Wednesday page....
"Why, Gary...why?".............
posted on 23/3/13
Excellent from both of you. 5*
posted on 23/3/13
Author Ye Olde Pastie's glorious tale is a masterclass in how to turn a rapscallion's dishonesty into this year's most hilarious narrative.
Verdict: laugh out loud funny
Rating:
posted on 24/3/13
Superb. 5*
Rumours are abound of a film being made of the whole thing with Leo Di Caprio, Brad Pitt, Tony Knowles starring and with Plastic Pam playing herself the budget has just gone to £6.75.
posted on 24/3/13
Very good!
posted on 24/3/13
Wonderful stuff, absolutely wonderful and with the addition from TCT this is the first EVER article to gain the coveted bonus as awarded by the soon-to-be Mrs Piper who is at this moment cracking up with laughter on the couch here in my lounge. Top stuff!
posted on 24/3/13
This article and Tony's comment really raises the bar!
Worth reading the Bolton 606 page again.
More stars than you can shake a broken spinnaker at.