A backpacker is traveling through Ireland when it starts to rain. He decides to wait out the storm in a nearby pub. The only other person at the bar is an older man staring at his drink. After a few moments of silence the man turns to the backpacker and says in a thick Irish accent:
"You see this bar? I built this bar with my own bare hands. I cut down every tree and made the lumber myself. I toiled away through the wind and cold, but do they call me McGreggor the bar builder? No."
He continued "Do you see that stone wall out there? I built that wall with my own bare hands. I found every stone and placed them just right through the rain and the mud, but do they call me McGreggor the wall builder? No."
"Do ya see that pier out there on the lake? I built that pier with my own bare hands, driving each piling deep into ground so that it would last a lifetime. Do they call me McGreggor the pier builder? No."
"But ya fvck one goat.."
A wee joke as there's no football
posted on 3/7/24
It's a good joke, but as old as the hills....
posted on 3/7/24
Very good Cloggy.
posted on 3/7/24
posted on 3/7/24
It's quite a good joke.
Not the goat by any means, but not bad.
posted on 4/7/24
Problem is it wasn't just one goat, was it?
No goat is safe.
posted on 4/7/24
u have to be kidding me
posted on 4/7/24
little Timmy ran into his house screaming "Farmer Dad, the Bull is r@pin a cow!"
Farmer Tom said to little Timmy "no no thats not the correct term little Timmy my boy, the bull is...'surprising' the cow"
little timmy hopped along with his newfound education on mating.
next morning little Timmy runs into the house and screams "Farmer Dad! the Bull is 'Surprising ALL the cows!"
Farmer Tom scratches his head and says to Little Timmy "thats not possible Little Timmy, the Bull can only 'Surprise' one cow at a time..."
Little TImmy relayes "no, Hes outside Fucin the horse"
posted on 4/7/24
Here's an old one but quite funny classic.
Englishman, Scotsman and Irishman are on a hunting holiday. They have been out for a few day and got nothing, so decide to try separately.
That night at the bar, the Englishman comes back with 2 deer over his shoulders. the other 2 go 'wow, where did you get them?' he replies, I saw the tracks, I smelt the tracks, I followed the tracks, and 'bang', I shot the deer.
Next night in the bar, the Scotsman comes back with 2 deer over his shoulders. He says, I saw the tracks, I smelt the tracks, I followed the tracks, and 'bang', I shot the deer.
The Irishman is gleeful and can't wait for his turn. The next night, it's quite late in the bar, and the other 2 notice there is no sign of the Irishman.
Then the door slams open and he limps in, on crutches, head bandaged, struggling to walk.
The other 2 say, 'what happened to you??!!'
The Irishman replies, I saw the tracks, I smelt the tracks, I followed the tracks, and 'bang', I got hit by a train.