I'd like to join the trip, pasty, just one question- if after paying I find I'm sick or injured on the day of departure, will I qualify for £30k a week whilst I rest at home?
5* lovely distraction!

Brilliant Carrs

Can I ask that we also take in the legendary allotments near Sheffield where some ginger gardening expert has grown Guiness Record breaking marrows!!

I believe under the terms and conditions that if you are sick or injured before or during the trip you are sent on loan to the League 1 school of hard knocks where you will be kicked back to health by a burly bearded nurse in doc martens at no extra cost.

RiD
I'm sorry due to insurance issues we are unable te meet that request. However we would like to offer you a place on a Gurney in the Reebok corridors as a gesture of good will.

CEF
Due to the Scape Goat eating all vegetation the allotments visit had to be withdrawn I'm sure this will not spoil your holiday

Can you forward me details on the imaginary cruise and blow up doll offer please? I have heard good things about it?