Comment deleted by Site Moderator
“In the end I just gave the phone back. I cant be bothered to go through that nonsense which is what she pulls every time.”
I think this will hurt you more in the long run. Short term pain for long term gain. When they think they can get away with it, they’ll push and push the boundaries.
Not easy though, that’s for sure!
I just tell my kids that every tantrum they throw when I take the tablet off them shows me they need longer away from it as they are addicted and it is making them a bad person.
Then I either add time they aren’t allowed on it or limit tablet privileges by 30 mins or so.
If they do it next time I limit privileges by an hour. Etc etc.
They soon learn.
comment by United we win (U19958)
posted 7 minutes ago
Nah - if your parent doesn’t abuse their spouse and there is clear lines of respect, those issues won’t happen. My dad has good control over his behaviour and knows what to say and not to say. Doesn’t need aggression or anger to demonstrate it. However it does help he is a big guy and commanding as he’s 6ft3 and built; he came to this country when 18 and by himself surrounded with rough individuals in Hackney in late 80s and 90s and was stabbed himself. So he knows the risks.
So as a kid you automatically have that level of respect. There is no negotiation as a kid anyway. He’s the parent and knows best and there for your best interests. I understood clearly when I was 15 for example that going out too late was not good, even when other friends did for example. And when that age you see people getting stabbed for being out too late it makes sense. I was wise enough to understand this.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
My son is well behaved and does what he is told without me treating him like a soldier under my command. All this 'don't talk back' crap isn't used in my household. If he disagrees with something we talk about it. On occasion I've misunderstood him and found that he was right. I bet there were times when you were right but you didn't dare say that. What benefit is that? It teaches you not to question authority no matter what. This kid will likely be in a low quality job in future without a mind of his own afraid to air his own ideas.
Behaving, being respectful etc should be the kids morals as he was taught by his parents not forced upon him. This could mean the kid behaves and is respectful when under the parent's command but when the kid becomes an adult and doesn't have this 'commander' he behaves in a different way. The kid should know why he should behave a certain way and it should not be due to fear.
If you're both using Android phones I suggest checking out Google's "Family Link" app:
It allows you to restrict which apps can be downloaded and installed from the Play Store, with requests for parental approval for any new download attempts.
You can enable or disable any app that has been installed on the device. Set activity limits either globally or per app, location tracking and remote device locking etc. all via your Phone or via their website.
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
Btw OP, thread of the week 👏
I try to limit screen time to 4hrs per day for my son (13). And if he achieves this by the end of the week reward him. And if not curtail screen time to 2/3 hrs a day.
Phone curfew always at least an hour before bed, as being on a phone just before sleep is not conducive to a good night's sleep.
Also you need to set boundaries, and just as importantly stick to/enforce them. Or kids will walk all over you. Knowing that they can push back on boundaries to get a more favourable outcome.
comment by Igòr; League 1, you’ve being Warne-D 🐏🤍🖤 (U22200)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
----------------------------------------------------------------------
why do 8 year olds need a smart phone?
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
comment by Ace (U22861)
posted 48 seconds ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by Igòr; League 1, you’ve being Warne-D 🐏🤍🖤 (U22200)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
----------------------------------------------------------------------
why do 8 year olds need a smart phone?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
His daughter is 12 I think.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
then even a 12 year old?
Make a pact with your kids. You will get a smart phone (with parental control on it) when you turn 13.
Like the op , I also do have a 12 year-old daughter who's on her tablet and/or laptop from the moment she gets home from school until bedtime which is 9:30 for her.
Try to take those devices away from her before 9:30 ... I dare ya
Big difference between a tablet/Laptop/PC and a mobile.
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 1 minute ago
Big difference between a tablet/Laptop/PC and a mobile.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
No , not really
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 4 minutes ago
comment by Ace (U22861)
posted 48 seconds ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by Igòr; League 1, you’ve being Warne-D 🐏🤍🖤 (U22200)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
----------------------------------------------------------------------
why do 8 year olds need a smart phone?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
His daughter is 12 I think.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
then even a 12 year old?
Make a pact with your kids. You will get a smart phone (with parental control on it) when you turn 13.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
What relevance is 13 or a teenager?
I imagine most parents would want their secondary school children (11+) to have phones just to keep tabs on them.
Kidd now days are on a different level , you can’t discipline them or else you get nicked for assault , they don’t fear any sort of punishment and the police and schools don’t give a chit, my 14 year old walks out of school all of the time or we get is a text saying your son is not on school grounds anymore and we don’t know where he is ,we asked for calls we’ve he’s head of year and never get them .We need to go old school in this country and bring back good old fashioned hard rules and punishments it never did me any harm.
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 11 minutes ago
comment by Igòr; League 1, you’ve being Warne-D 🐏🤍🖤 (U22200)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
----------------------------------------------------------------------
why do 8 year olds need a smart phone?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
I haven’t even said my piece yet fella.
But as it happens utopia is present on this Saturday morning as my youngest 11, is gone to play football and my eldest 13 will shortly go to dance class.
So I’ve got some P & Q.
I’ll save my tech rant till later so.
comment by Edward Elizabeth Hitler. (U14393)
posted 2 minutes ago
Kidd now days are on a different level , you can’t discipline them or else you get nicked for assault , they don’t fear any sort of punishment and the police and schools don’t give a chit, my 14 year old walks out of school all of the time or we get is a text saying your son is not on school grounds anymore and we don’t know where he is ,we asked for calls we’ve he’s head of year and never get them .We need to go old school in this country and bring back good old fashioned hard rules and punishments it never did me any harm.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Certainly raises the question as to do we go back to "corporal" punishment? Not sure to be fair. I definitely don't hit my kids and neither does their mum ... And they're both lovely kids. And nowadays even a slap on the buttocks and you could get in deep shyyte with the law
I think these days you can configure to block certain IPs (Make sure you know your kids IP from the listing of connected devices to the router). Then you can time when the rule kicks in - maybe 10.00pm? Week-end add 1 hours, so it blocks the kids at 11.00pm
Kids will moan about dropped connection ("Dad! we don't have internet!" - pretend you don't
Kids are way too savvy though, so you will have to lay the law down before applying the rules through blocking traffic to their devices. You can even re-router their traffic through a religious site and only that site is available All other sites are blocked from 10pm
Liberalism has gone too far and destroyed social dynamics. You can barely discipline children anymore. It has damaged the family structure and promoted discord —good luck dealing with it.
You're not meant to be their best mate, you're meant to be their parent and that means upsetting/ disappointing them from time to time. It's called life.
If she's got access to her phone till 9pm she's doing well. She should be going to bed by 9.30 at latest anyway. She would be in my house.
My lad is only 8 and hasn't got a phone yet but thankfully he's a really good kid and has a very calm temperament. Hasn't given us any grief at all yet. I think we've been very lucky though as some of his mates are a bit much for me at times.
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
comment by Ace (U22861)
posted 8 minutes ago
comment by comic book guy (U17816)
posted 21 minutes ago
comment by Edward Elizabeth Hitler. (U14393)
posted 2 minutes ago
Kidd now days are on a different level , you can’t discipline them or else you get nicked for assault , they don’t fear any sort of punishment and the police and schools don’t give a chit, my 14 year old walks out of school all of the time or we get is a text saying your son is not on school grounds anymore and we don’t know where he is ,we asked for calls we’ve he’s head of year and never get them .We need to go old school in this country and bring back good old fashioned hard rules and punishments it never did me any harm.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Certainly raises the question as to do we go back to "corporal" punishment? Not sure to be fair. I definitely don't hit my kids and neither does their mum ... And they're both lovely kids. And nowadays even a slap on the buttocks and you could get in deep shyyte with the law
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Of course you don’t. Hitting kids achieves nothing. My kids are awesome well behaved lads who like sport, have a nice bunch of mates and understand the difference between right and wrong - I’ve never and would never lay a finger on them. Yes they misbehave at times as all kids do, but you remedy it with clear boundaries and consequences for unacceptable behaviour that your absolutely follow through with. That’s all you need. My dad used to hit me and I was a little sheite at school regardless. He did it because his dad hit him. He didn’t have the same level of education and information around parenting that I do in my era, he just did what his parents did before him so I don’t hold it against him, but for myself I know there is no excuse for hitting a child. It’s what people who don’t know better do.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
I remember my Nan bless her soul used to have a wooden stick , she kept to hand , step out of line with her and she would beat you rotten with that thing , no one used to give her any chit
Sign in if you want to comment
Limiting screen time for kids
Page 2 of 5
posted on 19/11/22
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
posted on 19/11/22
“In the end I just gave the phone back. I cant be bothered to go through that nonsense which is what she pulls every time.”
I think this will hurt you more in the long run. Short term pain for long term gain. When they think they can get away with it, they’ll push and push the boundaries.
Not easy though, that’s for sure!
posted on 19/11/22
I just tell my kids that every tantrum they throw when I take the tablet off them shows me they need longer away from it as they are addicted and it is making them a bad person.
Then I either add time they aren’t allowed on it or limit tablet privileges by 30 mins or so.
If they do it next time I limit privileges by an hour. Etc etc.
They soon learn.
posted on 19/11/22
comment by United we win (U19958)
posted 7 minutes ago
Nah - if your parent doesn’t abuse their spouse and there is clear lines of respect, those issues won’t happen. My dad has good control over his behaviour and knows what to say and not to say. Doesn’t need aggression or anger to demonstrate it. However it does help he is a big guy and commanding as he’s 6ft3 and built; he came to this country when 18 and by himself surrounded with rough individuals in Hackney in late 80s and 90s and was stabbed himself. So he knows the risks.
So as a kid you automatically have that level of respect. There is no negotiation as a kid anyway. He’s the parent and knows best and there for your best interests. I understood clearly when I was 15 for example that going out too late was not good, even when other friends did for example. And when that age you see people getting stabbed for being out too late it makes sense. I was wise enough to understand this.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
My son is well behaved and does what he is told without me treating him like a soldier under my command. All this 'don't talk back' crap isn't used in my household. If he disagrees with something we talk about it. On occasion I've misunderstood him and found that he was right. I bet there were times when you were right but you didn't dare say that. What benefit is that? It teaches you not to question authority no matter what. This kid will likely be in a low quality job in future without a mind of his own afraid to air his own ideas.
Behaving, being respectful etc should be the kids morals as he was taught by his parents not forced upon him. This could mean the kid behaves and is respectful when under the parent's command but when the kid becomes an adult and doesn't have this 'commander' he behaves in a different way. The kid should know why he should behave a certain way and it should not be due to fear.
posted on 19/11/22
If you're both using Android phones I suggest checking out Google's "Family Link" app:
It allows you to restrict which apps can be downloaded and installed from the Play Store, with requests for parental approval for any new download attempts.
You can enable or disable any app that has been installed on the device. Set activity limits either globally or per app, location tracking and remote device locking etc. all via your Phone or via their website.
posted on 19/11/22
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
posted on 19/11/22
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
Btw OP, thread of the week 👏
posted on 19/11/22
I try to limit screen time to 4hrs per day for my son (13). And if he achieves this by the end of the week reward him. And if not curtail screen time to 2/3 hrs a day.
Phone curfew always at least an hour before bed, as being on a phone just before sleep is not conducive to a good night's sleep.
Also you need to set boundaries, and just as importantly stick to/enforce them. Or kids will walk all over you. Knowing that they can push back on boundaries to get a more favourable outcome.
posted on 19/11/22
comment by Igòr; League 1, you’ve being Warne-D 🐏🤍🖤 (U22200)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
----------------------------------------------------------------------
why do 8 year olds need a smart phone?
posted on 19/11/22
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
posted on 19/11/22
comment by Ace (U22861)
posted 48 seconds ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by Igòr; League 1, you’ve being Warne-D 🐏🤍🖤 (U22200)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
----------------------------------------------------------------------
why do 8 year olds need a smart phone?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
His daughter is 12 I think.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
then even a 12 year old?
Make a pact with your kids. You will get a smart phone (with parental control on it) when you turn 13.
posted on 19/11/22
Like the op , I also do have a 12 year-old daughter who's on her tablet and/or laptop from the moment she gets home from school until bedtime which is 9:30 for her.
Try to take those devices away from her before 9:30 ... I dare ya
posted on 19/11/22
Big difference between a tablet/Laptop/PC and a mobile.
posted on 19/11/22
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 1 minute ago
Big difference between a tablet/Laptop/PC and a mobile.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
No , not really
posted on 19/11/22
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
posted on 19/11/22
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
posted on 19/11/22
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 4 minutes ago
comment by Ace (U22861)
posted 48 seconds ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by Igòr; League 1, you’ve being Warne-D 🐏🤍🖤 (U22200)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
----------------------------------------------------------------------
why do 8 year olds need a smart phone?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
His daughter is 12 I think.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
then even a 12 year old?
Make a pact with your kids. You will get a smart phone (with parental control on it) when you turn 13.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
What relevance is 13 or a teenager?
I imagine most parents would want their secondary school children (11+) to have phones just to keep tabs on them.
posted on 19/11/22
Kidd now days are on a different level , you can’t discipline them or else you get nicked for assault , they don’t fear any sort of punishment and the police and schools don’t give a chit, my 14 year old walks out of school all of the time or we get is a text saying your son is not on school grounds anymore and we don’t know where he is ,we asked for calls we’ve he’s head of year and never get them .We need to go old school in this country and bring back good old fashioned hard rules and punishments it never did me any harm.
posted on 19/11/22
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 11 minutes ago
comment by Igòr; League 1, you’ve being Warne-D 🐏🤍🖤 (U22200)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by RB&W - Whiteside has done it again (U21434)
posted 58 seconds ago
Just dont give pre teenage kids mobile phones FFS.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In a ideal world, unfortunately…….
----------------------------------------------------------------------
why do 8 year olds need a smart phone?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
I haven’t even said my piece yet fella.
But as it happens utopia is present on this Saturday morning as my youngest 11, is gone to play football and my eldest 13 will shortly go to dance class.
So I’ve got some P & Q.
I’ll save my tech rant till later so.
posted on 19/11/22
comment by Edward Elizabeth Hitler. (U14393)
posted 2 minutes ago
Kidd now days are on a different level , you can’t discipline them or else you get nicked for assault , they don’t fear any sort of punishment and the police and schools don’t give a chit, my 14 year old walks out of school all of the time or we get is a text saying your son is not on school grounds anymore and we don’t know where he is ,we asked for calls we’ve he’s head of year and never get them .We need to go old school in this country and bring back good old fashioned hard rules and punishments it never did me any harm.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Certainly raises the question as to do we go back to "corporal" punishment? Not sure to be fair. I definitely don't hit my kids and neither does their mum ... And they're both lovely kids. And nowadays even a slap on the buttocks and you could get in deep shyyte with the law
posted on 19/11/22
I think these days you can configure to block certain IPs (Make sure you know your kids IP from the listing of connected devices to the router). Then you can time when the rule kicks in - maybe 10.00pm? Week-end add 1 hours, so it blocks the kids at 11.00pm
Kids will moan about dropped connection ("Dad! we don't have internet!" - pretend you don't
Kids are way too savvy though, so you will have to lay the law down before applying the rules through blocking traffic to their devices. You can even re-router their traffic through a religious site and only that site is available All other sites are blocked from 10pm
posted on 19/11/22
Liberalism has gone too far and destroyed social dynamics. You can barely discipline children anymore. It has damaged the family structure and promoted discord —good luck dealing with it.
posted on 19/11/22
You're not meant to be their best mate, you're meant to be their parent and that means upsetting/ disappointing them from time to time. It's called life.
If she's got access to her phone till 9pm she's doing well. She should be going to bed by 9.30 at latest anyway. She would be in my house.
My lad is only 8 and hasn't got a phone yet but thankfully he's a really good kid and has a very calm temperament. Hasn't given us any grief at all yet. I think we've been very lucky though as some of his mates are a bit much for me at times.
posted on 19/11/22
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
posted on 19/11/22
comment by Ace (U22861)
posted 8 minutes ago
comment by comic book guy (U17816)
posted 21 minutes ago
comment by Edward Elizabeth Hitler. (U14393)
posted 2 minutes ago
Kidd now days are on a different level , you can’t discipline them or else you get nicked for assault , they don’t fear any sort of punishment and the police and schools don’t give a chit, my 14 year old walks out of school all of the time or we get is a text saying your son is not on school grounds anymore and we don’t know where he is ,we asked for calls we’ve he’s head of year and never get them .We need to go old school in this country and bring back good old fashioned hard rules and punishments it never did me any harm.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Certainly raises the question as to do we go back to "corporal" punishment? Not sure to be fair. I definitely don't hit my kids and neither does their mum ... And they're both lovely kids. And nowadays even a slap on the buttocks and you could get in deep shyyte with the law
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Of course you don’t. Hitting kids achieves nothing. My kids are awesome well behaved lads who like sport, have a nice bunch of mates and understand the difference between right and wrong - I’ve never and would never lay a finger on them. Yes they misbehave at times as all kids do, but you remedy it with clear boundaries and consequences for unacceptable behaviour that your absolutely follow through with. That’s all you need. My dad used to hit me and I was a little sheite at school regardless. He did it because his dad hit him. He didn’t have the same level of education and information around parenting that I do in my era, he just did what his parents did before him so I don’t hold it against him, but for myself I know there is no excuse for hitting a child. It’s what people who don’t know better do.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
I remember my Nan bless her soul used to have a wooden stick , she kept to hand , step out of line with her and she would beat you rotten with that thing , no one used to give her any chit
Page 2 of 5